Top Ten Tips for People Affected by Bullying
Roger & Christine Day
Let's make every week Anti-Bullying Week. Whether you are bullied at work, school, college or home, you can find ways to make life easier for yourself. Here's how:
1. Build your self-esteem Find five positive things you can say about yourself. Memorise them and say them to yourself in situations where you might be bullied. Remember: Bullies only hit people who are down.
2. Walk tall Learn to walk around with a spring in your step, straight back, head up and shoulders wide. When you walk tall people are less likely to pick on you. Remember: Bullies aim for those who hang their heads.
3. Respect yourself You deserve to be treated with respect so avoid belittling yourself or making jokes at your own expense. See yourself as vulnerable, not a victim, and learn to stand up for yourself. Remember: The bully loves to attack people who don't respect themselves.
4. Say 'No!' without smiling Practice speaking in front of a mirror so that when you say something you give the same message with your facial expression. The easiest way to practise is to say a firm: 'No!', making your bottom lip heavy, with no upturn of the mouth corners. Remember: Bullies may pounce on those who don't really mean what they say.
5. Become assertive Being assertive means saying what you want with confidence. It involves getting your needs met without being aggressive, compromising your belief or submissively allowing someone else to ignore or deny your point of view. Remember: Bullies pick off the weaklings, knowing they won't speak up for themselves.
6. Find a friend Develop a friendship with someone who regularly says good things about you. Carry those positive messages in your mind as you go into potentially bullying situations. Remember: If you're a loner, bullies may target you.
7. Learn self-defence Enrol in a form of self-defence or a martial art that suits you. As you learn to protect yourself physically, you send out to other people psychological signals of self-confidence. Remember: The bully sniffs out defenceless people.
8. Use imagination In your imagination (without telling them) bring bullies down to ordinariness with a splash of humour. Maybe imagine them standing naked in a wastepaper basket! Remember: Bullies are ordinary people with the same bodily functions as everyone else.
9. Take care of yourself Pay attention to yourself and your needs. Get enough sleep, eat well and get plenty of exercise. Look your best by wearing clothes that enhance your appearance rather than drawing attention to, say, being slightly overweight or short or tall. If you have a visible birthmark or scar use camouflage cream – CLICK HERE FOR MORE INFORMATION. Remember: Bullies spot and target the vulnerable areas of a person.
10. Believe you can succeed Look at the successes you have had so far in life. Write them down and remember them. All of us have strengths. Focus on those rather than weaknesses and shortcomings. Remember: Bullies love to focus on people who see themselves as failures
Roger Day UKCP Registered Psychotherapist, Certified Play Therapist
Christine Day Diploma in Counselling, European Adult Teaching Certificate
If you would like to enquire about therapy contact us on 01788 541 937 or via email: brookcreativetherapy@gmail.com
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